If I told you...

by Magnolia

Sportsfan likes to use the “If I told you…” argument when he’s trying to make a point. Like, “If I told you that a 7 year old girl could make your bowl picks and you would end up in first place with one game to go, would you believe me?”

Oh yes. Every year Little E makes my bowl picks for me. Sportsfan and Junior study, research, enter their picks, research some more, change their picks and finally settle on what they are sure is a winning combination. Little E and I sit down every year at the last possible moment and in under 10 minutes have our picks made. The process is very simple. I go down the list and call out the 2 teams playing, and Little E gives me her pick. We don’t talk point spreads and we don’t talk mascots.

So if you know of any 7 year olds, you probably know who they are going to pick—Navy, Rice, Air Force, Hawaii. There are reasons for some picks like Ohio State because she knows my roommate from college is a big fan. The Rice pick is self explanatory and as Sportsfan would say, “She would pick Hawaii over the Pittsburgh Steelers just because it’s Hawaii”. But mostly, the picks are just how she’s feeling at the moment.

Now they’ve never said it before, but I am certain that Sportsfan and Junior have thought that we don’t know what we’re talking about. Until now. We are now in FIRST PLACE in Bowlaroo which boasts over 60 (mostly male) members. With one game to go, we are now guaranteed 2nd place and if Oklahoma wins on Thursday, we win the whole thing. And it’s a lot of money. There is definitely a trip to the spa in our future.

For those of you interested in hiring her for her services in the future, she is under contract with me until she is no longer living under this roof. Go find your own 7 year old prodigy.

March Madness, here we come.